Losing a pet can feel devastating in a way that’s hard to explain to others. If you’re grieving the loss of a pet, you are not alone—and what you’re feeling is valid.
If you’re searching for how to cope with the loss of a pet, you may be feeling overwhelmed, heartbroken, or even confused by the intensity of your grief. For many people, a pet is not “just an animal”—they are a constant companion, a source of unconditional love, and part of your daily life in a deeply meaningful way.
Why Losing a Pet Hurts So Much
The grief after losing a pet can be profound because of the unique bond you shared.
Pets are often:
- Part of your daily routines
- A source of comfort during stress or loneliness
- A relationship without judgment or complication
Because of this, losing a pet can feel overwhelming. In some cases, pet loss grief can feel as intense—or even more intense—than losing a person.
There’s also something called disenfranchised grief, which means grief that isn’t always fully recognized or supported by others. When people say things like “it was just a pet”, it can deepen the pain and isolation.
Common Signs of Pet Loss Grief
Grief after the loss of a pet can show up emotionally, mentally, and physically.
You might experience:
- Intense sadness or crying spells
- Guilt (especially after euthanasia)
- Anxiety or restlessness
- Difficulty sleeping or concentrating
- A sense of emptiness or loss of routine
- Feeling “stuck” in your grief
There is no “right” way to grieve—and no set timeline for healing.
If you’re struggling with guilt, especially after euthanasia, you may find this helpful:
→ I Feel Guilty About Euthanizing My Pet—Is This Normal?
How to Cope With the Loss of a Pet
If you’re wondering how to deal with pet loss, these strategies can help support you through the grieving process.
1. Allow yourself to grieve fully
Give yourself permission to feel your emotions without minimizing them. Pet loss grief is real and valid.
2. Create a ritual or memorial
Honoring your pet can help you process the loss. Some ideas include:
Write a Letter to Your Pet
This can be a really useful way to express your feelings towards to your pet and clarify what your pet meant to you. I often hear from people that they worry about forgetting their pet and they won’t remember the special quirks or behaviors that made their pet unique. Writing a letter that includes your favorite memories or special aspects about your pet can help you to focus on the positive as well as provide a way to ensure that your memories stay alive.
Create a Photo Album
If you feel ready, gathering photos of your pet and creating a photo book can be a useful tool for healing. There are so many sites that make it easy to create high-quality photo books that can be a tangible reminder of what your pet meant to you. Printique is my favorite place to print books.
Making a Memorial Space at Home
Find a corner of your home and put framed photos and perhaps your pet’s favorite toys in the space. This can be an area for reflection and a way to continue to honor your relationship with your pet.
3. Talk about your pet with supportive people
Sharing memories can be healing—but only with people who understand the depth of your loss. If others minimize your grief, it can make coping with pet loss more difficult. Consider individual pet loss counseling or an online pet loss support group if you feel like people in your life aren’t getting it.
4. Express your grief creatively
Expressing your painful feelings in a tangible way—in writing or in an artistic expression—can help to put some distance between the part of you that is in pain and the other parts that are resilient and strong. The death of a pet can leave us feeling helpless and without control. Creating something can help to restore a sense of empowerment and offer an active way to move through the grieving process.
Create a Mandala
The circular form of the mandala is one that has had a universally soothing quality for thousands of years. Quite often creating imagery inside of a circle elicits emotional expression and can be a comforting experience. You do not have to be artistic to do this. Simply trace a circle onto a piece of paper (you can use a plate, a can, any round container) and using crayons, markers, pastels, pencils or whatever material you have available simply draw what’s on your mind in the moment. Your imagery does not need to be realistic, but can be abstract shapes, lines and colors. Just let your mind flow and see what happens. Quite often the circle shape acts as a container for feelings and can help to lessen their intensity.
Make a Collage
Do you have lots of pictures of your pet? Pull some of your favorites and any other images (from magazines, the internet, other photo collections) that inspire or resonate and cut them out. Fill a page with pictures, words, stories about your pet, meaningful quotes. It is the process here that can really help you foster good memories, gain control and help you to generally feel better. Let go of any expectation for what it should look like and let yourself play for a little while.
Create a Special Box
Boxes can offer a sense of containment, safety and security. Decorate a special box and put some photos and or special things that remind you of your pet—favorite toys, tags, collars or any other mementos you may have. You can write your thoughts and feelings on a pieces of paper and keep them safely in the box. Consider the box your safe space, almost a three-dimensional journal, and put items in there that are meaningful to you.
→ Here are some other ways art therapy can help with pet loss grief »
5. Be patient with your healing
Grief is not linear. Some days may feel easier, while others feel just as intense as the beginning. This is a normal part of coping with the loss of a pet.
Many people also wonder how long this will last:
→ How Long Does Pet Grief Last?
When to Seek Help for Pet Loss Grief
Sometimes, grief after losing a pet can feel overwhelming or persistent. You may benefit from pet loss counseling if you notice:
- Ongoing guilt about your pet’s death
- Feeling unable to move forward
- Intense loneliness or isolation
- Grief that isn’t easing over time
Working with a therapist can help you process your grief in a supportive and meaningful way.
If your grief feels overwhelming, you might be wondering whether therapy could help:
→ Do I Need Therapy for Pet Loss?
I offer virtual pet loss counseling for clients in New York, New Jersey, and Pennsylvania, where we can gently process your grief at your own pace.
For those who prefer a nonverbal approach, I also incorporate art therapy as a way to express and work through difficult emotions. Contact me if you would like support.
